Buffalo Grove High School valedictorian Denis Cooverman (PAUL RUST) has had quite an academic career...on paper, at least. Superlative student, conscientious young gentleman and patently obvious dork, Denis has played it safe and made it all the way to graduation day without ever having really experienced some of the joys of higher learning: breaking curfew, destruction of property, over-consumption of alcohol, fist fights, late nights, fast cars or faster women (actually, women of any sort).

But all of that is about to change, and all by uttering five little words: "I LOVE YOU, BETH COOPER."